Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, the fruit of the womb is a reward.

Psalm 127:3(NASB)

Every child is a miracle from above, for the bible says that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. This means that children are not only a gift from the Lord, but they are a heritage.

As parents, we have been entrusted with the gift of children and so should strive in bringing them up in the way they should go, for God has promised that when they are old, they will not depart from the way of truth.

When you sit and watch your children, do you grasp the magnitude or recognise the awesome responsibility, of the gift which you have been given… YOU have been entrusted, by the Lord to be parents!

The Lord has entrusted us to faithfully nurture and train our children according to his living word, following the discipline and instructions of the Lord, for his praise and glory.

Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 22: 6

There are many ways we, as parents, meet our children’s needs on a daily basis.

For us, as parents, raising our children up, to be socially and emotionally confident is where our hearts are at in preparing them for being men and women who are warriors for God's kingdom.

How do we meet our children’s needs…?

1. Supportive interactions… no matter what!

Supportive communication and interactions are the foundation for building healthy, strong and open relationships with children.

A wise, not so old pastor once told us, that to build a relationship with our teenage son we needed to make sure he absolutely knew that we, not only loved him unconditionally, but that nothing that he could ever do would make us love him less.

Sound easy and straight forward, but for children, especially in the season we all find ourselves in, we need to reinforce this daily with being intentional in our actions. One moment of anger, one slip of the tongue, words we speak in frustration, can undo more than we realise.

There are many ways we do this with our children, each of them is different, but there is one thing that is the same for all of them, when we listen to them.

Not hearing them but listening!

Listen attentively, making eye contact, and asking questions about what they are telling us.

Even with our 3-year-old, a simple thumbs up when we actually have no idea what the story she’s just told us is about, to her, what she has said is important and we have heard her.

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.

– James 1:19 (ESV)

2. Are they saying all they need to say?

One of our daughters came to sit next to me on the couch and stuck her head behind my shoulder and began to mumble about how she wasn’t happy about something. To me, it was irritation of life issues and normally my answer would be a simple I’m so sorry you feel like that.

My son walked past, plopped himself down next to her, put his feet up on the coffee table, and before she had even finished her story, asked “Did that make you feel like you had an empty hole feeling in your tummy?”

And just like that, with one question, out came a flood of feelings. Feelings that I didn’t see burning under, what I thought was a mundane issue!

Helping our children build their language and communication skills by asking them open-ended questions throughout the day, reading them books, letting them sing, yes at the top of their lungs and out of tune, is another way we can meet another one of their needs.

Their need to be able to express themselves freely, without judgment or fear of being dismissed.

Fine as an answer, is sometimes just a fine… but sometimes it needs a bit of digging!

But Jesus called them to him, saying, “Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God.

– Luke 18:16

3. How deep is home…

I’m sure some of you can agree with me that most children are sensitive to their environments.

A place to call home is a much deeper need that we may realise. Yes, it’s a roof over our head, a place we all return to after each day, but for our children, no matter how old they are, home is safe.

This concept has not been one I have reflected on much since our children are home day in and day out at the moment. But when life is no longer like this, when our children go out into the community again, when they are faced with our new normal, which is not what they have always known, their lives are bound to, in some degree turn into the Faraway trees story book, each day is a new land with new challenges to navigate.

New things to learn, old ways to relearn, strategies that need to be altered and routines must return. When they are thrown back into a topsy turvy way of life… where is the one place, they can come home to find open arms, security, and unconditional love…

When each day is done, no matter how old our children are, they need home!

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

KETTRICK SHEFFERMAN